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Bring back the candles

Updated: Jan 5

Gregg Cody's back in my day is right now0:07 and now it is time to take a trip down0:10 memory lane here's your guy break curry0:14 with back in my day fake candles folks0:25 candles have been around since 500 BC an0:27 industrially mass-marketed since the0:29 1830s of course I mean real candles you0:32 know an ignitable wick embedded in wax0:35 or other flammable substance such as0:36 tallow the candle provides light perhaps0:39 fragrance even heat a person who makes0:42 candles is called a Chandler0:43 from once we get the word chandelier0:45 candles are amazing things really a0:47 naked flame lights a wick which0:49 vaporizes a small amount of fuel or wax0:51 and once vaporized the fuel combines0:53 with oxygen to form a steady flame the0:56 marvel of science is the chain of events0:58 flames heat melts the top of the mass of1:01 fuel and that liquefied fuel moves up1:04 through the wick via capillary progress1:06 in time candle melts wick burns flame1:10 blinks out I say all this because the1:12 whole generation is growing up not1:13 knowing what a candle is this has1:15 occurred to me over time and any number1:17 of fine restaurants where a candle light1:19 dinner literally was the imprimatur of a1:22 romantic night out now most restaurants1:25 that still keep the candle alive do so1:27 fraudulently with so-called flameless1:29 candles that use batteries and a small1:31 LED light some of the fakes are even1:34 made to look like melting wax and have a1:36 slight flicker to the light like what to1:39 help pretend it's a real candle mm-hmm1:41 that's like having a doorbell that1:42 doesn't ring but instead of just opening1:45 the door you stand quietly on the other1:46 side wait for the dead button to be1:48 pressed and then say who are you fooling1:52 exactly people if you were skydiving1:54 indoors you aren't skydiving if you were1:56 climbing Everest in virtual reality you1:58 aren't mountain climbing and if you're2:00 using a candle you don't like with a2:02 flame you aren't using a candle what are2:05 scared restaurants afraid of a fire2:07 hazard yes there's glasses of water all2:10 over the table standing ready where is2:12 that health2:13 designer worried about the occasional2:16 little tendril of smoke diner there are2:18 more carcinogens entering your2:20 bloodstream from the surface of your2:21 charred grilled steak to the rock rising2:23 from that majestic Tower of wax bring2:26 back the candlelight dinner and save a2:28 marriage mine because my wife is so over2:31 me constantly railing against flameless2:33 candles and challenging the manager to2:34 defend his fraudulent lame stab at2:36 ambience a linen tablecloths as on vinyl2:39 records bring back the wax Jack Cody2:43 [Music]2:44 [Applause]2:46 yeah2:50 so many money he is done for the rest of2:56 the show it was great and we have lost2:58 it he is done he nails the dismount he's3:02 exhausted he rented perfect light pumps3:05 it was wonderful we will not have his3:08 attention the rest of this show3:09 [Laughter]

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